Hellraiser: Revelations (2011)


REVIEWER RATING: 
2/10


It's been six years since the last addition to the Hellraiser franchise and it honestly should've remained that way, because Revelations is simply a disgrace to the Hellraiser name. This film was only made on the fact that the studio was under contract to put forth a new Hellraiser flick in a certain amount of time, otherwise, they would've lost the rights to the remake, which is currently still having issues moving forward due to the lack of a proper script (no surprise).

How bad is it when Pinhead himself, Doug Bradley, wanted no part in this atrocity? The man has done every single addition to the series until this! Even Clive Barker was openly disgusted with the film and proclaimed via Twitter how this installment had nothing to do with him. Budgeted at an estimated $300k, the production moved on anyway, and yes, our suspicions were correct -- this is every bit as horrible as you'd expect from such a rushed and pointless effort.

So the story revolves around a couple young rich guys that decide to go to Mexico in some sort of attempt at being rebellious assholes towards their parents. The never return, and the only proof of what may have happened to them lies within some strange footage the guys captured with their camcorder during the trip. The camera was supposedly found by some private investigator that the parents hired when they went missing, but the footage wasn't the only thing brought back, as the Lament Configuration (surprise!) also came with it. You can pretty much guess where the film goes from there.

Although the movie is littered with problems, the biggest one would have to be how they attempted to pass off this new Pinhead as the original. Not only does he look horrible, but his voice and dialogue is even worse! Once Doug declined the part, they should've just done without Pinhead (or the movie) all together, because I'd personally rather have no Pinhead at all than some crappy half-assed attempt at the role that Doug made so famous.

As expected from a project like this, we're forced to sit through bad acting and really unlikeable characters, especially from the two main leads, who are incredibly annoying from the start. The movie literally begins with a camcorder all shaking and zoomed in on their faces as they go on overzealous nonsense rants about how they're in Mexico. Luckily, we don't have to witness much more of the nauseating camera footage after the 15-minute mark, but that's where the rest of the flick pretty much just plays out in some rich dude's living room, as the family of the missing guys are conveniently having some sort of dinner party.

I could go on and on about the numerous problems with this movie, like how there are barely any other Cenobites in the film, or how it wasn't nearly as graphic or gory as it should've been, but I'd rather not waste anymore keystrokes on this mess. Though, I would like to add how ridiculous it was seeing the filmmakers use Asian ladies to play Mexican whores, I mean seriously? What a waste. The only minor positive would be how SOME of the practical effects were somewhat decent, but that's seriously almost not even worth noting.

This installment is a complete disgrace to the Hellraiser name and an abomination that I'd like to soon forget. The film is boring, the acting and dialogue is bad, the story is terrible, and the new Pinhead is a straight slap in the face to us fans of the series. Avoid this worthless sequel at all costs!
OVERALL: 
This installment is a complete disgrace to the Hellraiser name and an abomination that I'd like to soon forget. The film is boring, the acting and dialogue is bad, the story is terrible, and the new Pinhead is a straight slap in the face to us fans of the series. Avoid this worthless sequel at all costs!


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