+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 20 of 23



  1. #1
    Thy flesh consumed.
    This user has no status.
     
    Bronner's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online
    07-07-2008

    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Member #
    12864
    Location
    Allentown, Pennsylvania
    Posts
    54
    Threads
    5
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 0
    Given: 0

    Day of the Dead (2008 Remake) - Review

    Day of the Dead (2008 Remake) Review...

    Movies don't come much worse than this. This movie, is so bad,
    that I don't even want to watch it again. George Romero's classic
    "Day of the Dead," from 1985 was awesome, despite its flaws, but
    this remake was the perfect chance to use Romero's original
    script for "Day," but what do they do? They hire the Dudelson
    (not kidding that is their name) Bros, two former porno directors
    who brought us "Contagium," a movie I bought at Blockbuster for
    two bucks and sold on ebay for ninety-nine cents-- that's just
    how fucking bad it is. I actually didn't even buy the new "Day,"
    I watched a pirate copy on an underground website that hosts
    movies that haven't come out yet. I did this for two reasons,
    one, there's no chance in Hell I'm going to give the Dudelson
    Bros money, and two, I knew it'd be bad, so what would be the
    point in plunking down my hard earned cash to watch this shit?
    Okay, now onto the review. The movie starts off with, oh, this is
    a surprise, some kids out in a cabin or something in the middle
    of the woods making out. THE MIDDLE OF THE FUCKING WOODS, HOW
    MANY FUCKING MOVIES CAN YOU MAKE THAT TAKE PLACE IN THE MIDDLE OF
    THE FUCKING WOODS?! But I digress, so the kids are making out,
    then one of them gets a nosebleed and basically turns into a
    zombie and kills the others, I think. It was just so horribly
    made that I can't remember all the details and there's no chance
    in fuck that I'm ever watching it again. So then we go and meet
    all the soldiers, Captain Rhodes, who is inexplicably and in-
    excusably a "good guy" in this movie (for those of you who have
    not seen the original, Rhodes was a BAD MAN), Salazar and Sarah--
    who wasn't even a soldier in the original movie. So, the soldiers
    have basically put up a roadblock on street in town hoping it
    will keep the zombies in. What they don't know is that the VIRUS
    is AIRBORNE! Oh, here's another horribly cliche trick, an airborne
    zombie-virus, why can't it just spread through the bites, like in
    a GOOD ZOMBIE MOVIE? I digress, again. So anyway now we got all
    sorts of sick people in the hospital, all of them sick from
    nosebleeds. Here's where we meet Doc Logan, who is inexplicably
    and in-excusably a "bad guy" in this 'retelling' of the classic.
    Doctor Logan and Sarah and Nick Cannon all try to escape the
    zombie-infested hospital, oh, which reminds me, the zombies in
    this movie not only run, but they climb on walls, shoot guns and
    I think one of them drives at one point, but anyway, Logan some-
    how manages to get out of there and he drives off. Sarah, Nick
    Cannon and a new character 'Bud,' who I'm assuming they meant to
    call "BUB," get out, but uh-oh, Bud's been bitten! Bud turns into
    a zombie but he doesn't attack Sarah and Nick Cannon because he
    was a vegetarian in life. Oh, okay, that makes sense, a person
    infected with the fatal zombie-virus, which gives someone an
    insatiable craving for human flesh (hence the tagline, 'the need
    to feed') decides not to eat human flesh because he remembers
    that he was a vegetarian in life. Yeah, wait, what?! No, it makes
    no sense whatsoever. Now we got running, driving vegetarian
    zombies all over the place! No! I want my zombies to shamble
    about mindlessly, eating people with no remorse and inhabit
    shopping malls the way they were meant to. So now somehow Sarah,
    Nick Cannon and Zombie-Bud are out in the woods where they come
    across the cabin or whatever the fuck it was that those kids were
    making out in at the beginning of the movie, and it's from here
    that they find their way into an underground bunker, military
    high-tech facility thing. I think it's supposed to be a reference
    to the ENTIRE SETTING OF THE 1985 CLASSIC, but I don't know,
    because this whole movie is so fucked up that it's practically
    illegible, even for a movie-whore like myself. So they're in the
    bunker and guess who's there, oh, it's Logan again! And it turns
    out Logan created the virus that makes people into zombies, or at
    least, his friend did, who they keep saying is like, the uber-
    zombie or something. So now Logan teams up with Sarah, Bud and
    Nick Cannon, Bud somehow gets separated from the group (he's a
    mindless walking corpse, I wonder how that happened) and they
    decide their going to bomb the bunker back to the fires from
    whence it came. So, they plant bombs, I think, I don't remember
    if the bombs were already there or not, it wouldn't surprise me
    because the movie was written more poorly than a Sci-Fi Channel
    Original movie. They plant the bombs, super-zombie comes out,
    kills Logan, then tears off Bub's head and crushes him. Sarah
    goes into an apparently "bomb-proof" room and sets off the bomb.
    The last thing we see is Sarah, Nick Cannon and some third person
    who wasn't really important to the plot driving away into the
    mountains, but then, one last shock scare, as a zombie pops up
    and screams. I was so mad when this movie was over. Between the
    hiring of the Dudelson Bros and the not using Romero's awesome
    first-draft script, I'm dumbfounded as to how this movie even got
    made. But, I suppose these things happen, and you can't help
    invalids like the Dudelsons, or the Sci-Fi Channel. All this, and
    Uwe Boll gets to keep on making movies. Oh, what a world.

    ~ Bronner

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!
    Reality is a state of mind.

  2. #2
    Rotting Member
    This user has no status.
     
    ASoron0424's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online
    04-13-2010

    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Member #
    10724
    Location
    Miami, Fl
    Posts
    503
    Threads
    28
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 0
    Given: 0
    It wouldn't have been wise or even remotely beneficial to use Romero's script again. If someone is remaking a horror movie, they're probably not doing it out of a 100% tribute to the person who birthed the whole concept of the movie, they're doing it to offer what they think will be a better take on a movie they love, and sometimes it works, but mostly it doesn't. But look at the best remakes of recent years: TCM, Dawn of the Dead, The Hills Have Eyes, and, to a much lesser extent but still respectable, Halloween. None of them are as good as their predecessors, but they impact today's audiences as closely as the originals impacted the audiences of their own time. In part, what these movies are doing are sustaining the good name of the movies they love by keeping them scary. There really aren't many things in Romero's Day that could've been drastically improved with today's technology, so why fix what isn't broken? Instead, just change it up a little bit. Look at how fans of the original Funny Games regard the American version, they hate it because it's a word-for-word rendition of the original, and made only 11 years apart.
    Rather than see it as a disgrace to Romero's original, look at it as an absolutely shitty movie that happens to have the same name. This is a big problem with people trashing remakes, they go in with a blatant predisposition to hate it because they'll never allow themselves to say So-n-So is better than Romero or Craven or Carpenter or whomever. If you're sitting in front of the screen with your arms crossed, demanding a good impression rather than awaiting entertainment, you're gonna be disappointed every time.

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!

    "This is not an exit."

  3. #3
    Thy flesh consumed.
    This user has no status.
     
    Bronner's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online
    07-07-2008

    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Member #
    12864
    Location
    Allentown, Pennsylvania
    Posts
    54
    Threads
    5
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 0
    Given: 0
    I guess so... but they could have just not remade the movie.

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!
    Reality is a state of mind.

  4. #4
    Rotting Member
    This user has no status.
     
    ASoron0424's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online
    04-13-2010

    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Member #
    10724
    Location
    Miami, Fl
    Posts
    503
    Threads
    28
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 0
    Given: 0
    But what's the harm in having done so? All it does is add more appreciation to Romero's and will in the end have lost some money for some very over-ambitious, talentless, careless filmmakers.

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!

    "This is not an exit."

  5. #5
    Thy flesh consumed.
    This user has no status.
     
    Bronner's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online
    07-07-2008

    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Member #
    12864
    Location
    Allentown, Pennsylvania
    Posts
    54
    Threads
    5
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 0
    Given: 0
    Quote Originally Posted by ASoron0424 View Post
    But what's the harm in having done so? All it does is add more appreciation to Romero's and will in the end have lost some money for some very over-ambitious, talentless, careless filmmakers.
    This is true, I guess all I'm really trying to say is, some stones are better left unturned.

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!
    Reality is a state of mind.

  6. #6
    The Architect
    This user has no status.
     
    FrighT MasteR's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online

    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Member #
    1
    Location
    A semi-dark room
    Posts
    31,640
    Threads
    1837
    My Mood
    Lurking
    Follow FrighT MasteR On Twitter Add FrighT MasteR on Facebook
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 879
    Given: 134
    Gamer IDs

    PSN ID frightie Steam ID frightie
    Just a head's up -- you should consider spacing out your paragraphs to make it easier on the eyes :nod:

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!

  7. #7
    Thy flesh consumed.
    This user has no status.
     
    Bronner's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online
    07-07-2008

    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Member #
    12864
    Location
    Allentown, Pennsylvania
    Posts
    54
    Threads
    5
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 0
    Given: 0
    Quote Originally Posted by FrighT MasteR View Post
    Just a head's up -- you should consider spacing out your paragraphs to make it easier on the eyes :nod:
    Oh fuck, I didn't even think of that! Thanks man the next review will be much easier to read. :bigthumbup:

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!
    Reality is a state of mind.

  8. #8
    Fresh Zealot
    I am high.
     
    steelba's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online
    11-19-2019

    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Member #
    34
    Location
    Everett, WA
    Age
    42
    Posts
    11,497
    Threads
    78
    My Mood
    Hungover
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 24
    Given: 10
    Who's puppet are you

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!



    Steelbaz Youtube Channel


    Nosferatu = UHM's Snitch

  9. #9
    Thy flesh consumed.
    This user has no status.
     
    Bronner's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online
    07-07-2008

    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Member #
    12864
    Location
    Allentown, Pennsylvania
    Posts
    54
    Threads
    5
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 0
    Given: 0
    Quote Originally Posted by steelba View Post
    Who's puppet are you
    Uh, Gonzo I guess, he's the funniest Muppet.

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!
    Reality is a state of mind.

  10. #10
    UHM's #1 Killer
    Half of life is fucking up,
    the other half is dealing with
    it.
     
    KING's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online
    11-25-2023

    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Member #
    10079
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    12,058
    Threads
    34
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 2
    Given: 0
    :cheerlead

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!
    "(Insanity) is not hubris, not pride; it is inflation of the ego to its ultimate - confusion between him who worships and that which is worshiped.
    Man has not eaten God; God has eaten man." Philip K. Dick The Man in the High Castle (1962)

  11. #11
    Fresh Zealot
    I am high.
     
    steelba's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online
    11-19-2019

    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Member #
    34
    Location
    Everett, WA
    Age
    42
    Posts
    11,497
    Threads
    78
    My Mood
    Hungover
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 24
    Given: 10
    :shootemup: Die Puppet

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!



    Steelbaz Youtube Channel


    Nosferatu = UHM's Snitch

  12. #12
    Drunken Master
    This user has no status.
     
    Nightmares's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online
    05-31-2021

    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Member #
    1530
    Location
    Tx
    Age
    44
    Posts
    1,288
    Threads
    13
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 3
    Given: 0

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!

  13. #13
    ...
    This user has no status.
     
    Red's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online

    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Member #
    15
    Location
    Severnaya
    Posts
    3,095
    Threads
    159
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 56
    Given: 10
    Mena Suvari and Rhames musta been pretty desperate to take this project.

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!

  14. #14
    better than you
    #BoredAsFu@k
     

    Status
    Offline
    Last Online

    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Member #
    8846
    Posts
    410
    Threads
    2
    My Mood
    Bored
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 0
    Given: 0
    This seems a lot more like a detailed synopsis than an actual review.

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!

  15. #15
    UHM's #1 Killer
    Half of life is fucking up,
    the other half is dealing with
    it.
     
    KING's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online
    11-25-2023

    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Member #
    10079
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    12,058
    Threads
    34
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 2
    Given: 0
    The review is probably more entertaining than the movie, good job.

    "Now we got running, driving vegetarian zombies all over the place!"

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!
    "(Insanity) is not hubris, not pride; it is inflation of the ego to its ultimate - confusion between him who worships and that which is worshiped.
    Man has not eaten God; God has eaten man." Philip K. Dick The Man in the High Castle (1962)

  16. #16
    UHM's #1 Killer
    Half of life is fucking up,
    the other half is dealing with
    it.
     
    KING's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online
    11-25-2023

    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Member #
    10079
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    12,058
    Threads
    34
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 2
    Given: 0
    Quote Originally Posted by ASoron0424 View Post
    But look at the best remakes of recent years: TCM, Dawn of the Dead, The Hills Have Eyes, and, to a much lesser extent but still respectable, Halloween. None of them are as good as their predecessors.
    The Hills Have Eyes remake killed the original IMO.

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!
    "(Insanity) is not hubris, not pride; it is inflation of the ego to its ultimate - confusion between him who worships and that which is worshiped.
    Man has not eaten God; God has eaten man." Philip K. Dick The Man in the High Castle (1962)

  17. #17
    Rotting Member
    This user has no status.
     
    ASoron0424's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online
    04-13-2010

    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Member #
    10724
    Location
    Miami, Fl
    Posts
    503
    Threads
    28
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 0
    Given: 0
    Quote Originally Posted by King_ov_Hell View Post
    The Hills Have Eyes remake killed the original IMO.
    That's what I suspected after I first saw the remake and didn't like it that much, but then I saw Craven's original to see what went wrong and I realized that the remake was a tremendous improvement.
    But I'm not like attacking your opinion, King, I know a lot of people agree with you, probably more than there are people who would agree with me, but I would say Craven's "Hills" ranks up in probably the top ten or fifteen most overrated horror movies.

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!

    "This is not an exit."

  18. #18
    Thy flesh consumed.
    This user has no status.
     
    Bronner's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online
    07-07-2008

    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Member #
    12864
    Location
    Allentown, Pennsylvania
    Posts
    54
    Threads
    5
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 0
    Given: 0
    God, I thought the ORIGINAL "Hills Have Eyes" gargled balls.

    ...it didn't even have an ending!

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!
    Reality is a state of mind.

  19. #19
    UHM's Horror DVD Informant
    UHM's Biggest Fuck Up.
     
    xxsic4slipknotxx's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online
    03-02-2022

    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Member #
    9550
    Location
    Southeastern PA
    Age
    39
    Posts
    13,961
    Threads
    162
    My Mood
    Cheerful
    Follow xxsic4slipknotxx On Twitter Add xxsic4slipknotxx on Facebook
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 4
    Given: 3
    I'm still not interested in watching this :thumbsdown:

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!


    "In Heaven, Everything is Fine" ~ Eraserhead



    ~ Let The Right One In (Låt den rätte komma in)

    My Collection!

    Be My Netflix Friend:
    http://www.netflix.com/BeMyFriend/P9vLvHRtq4eIQLWoXbtg

  20. #20
    UHM's #1 Killer
    Half of life is fucking up,
    the other half is dealing with
    it.
     
    KING's Avatar
    Status
    Offline
    Last Online
    11-25-2023

    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Member #
    10079
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    12,058
    Threads
    34
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 2
    Given: 0
    I seen this DVD at a shop today actually, they were selling it for $33.00 That stock aint movin.

    0 Not allowed! Not allowed!
    "(Insanity) is not hubris, not pride; it is inflation of the ego to its ultimate - confusion between him who worships and that which is worshiped.
    Man has not eaten God; God has eaten man." Philip K. Dick The Man in the High Castle (1962)

+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •