RHI's Maneater Series and SyFy Cheese

[strtfghtr]

It's a well known fact that I have an unhealthy love for terrible horror movies. Many people would call them garbage and not even give them a chance but in reality, many of these badboys are the "straight to video" movies of the 2000s. I almost never see anyone mention any of these SyFy CGI schlockfests so I figured why not give them their own UHM home

Many of these aren't worth an entire thread so I thought I'd stick them all together into one and have a discussion if anyone is up for it. I won't go into full reviews but maybe just mention some plot points and any highlights that are in them (if any). So let's get this off to a solid start.

BloodMonkey (2007) - A group of grad students travel to the jungle for some field exposure and get more than they bargained for when their teacher turns out to be a maniacal scientist driven by a desire for fame to force these unknowing students into a secluded section of the jungle to search out a blood thirsty new variety of ape. The acting in this is awful, which is to be expected, though surprisingly some of the kills are not too bad. There's even a nice face ripping scene done with practical effects.

One of the oddest parts of this movie is the scientist's assistant who is some kind of Thai mercenary or something. They never fully explain it but when she ends up kicking a nerd in the face as he's trying to repel down a rock face I nearly crapped my self laughing from just how unnecessary it was. I mean the kid is already going down the mountain as fast as his spindly little arms will allow him, you're only going make it take longer by kicking him repeatedly.

The setting is great and it was obviously filmed on location so the production is better than the average SyFy trash. The apes aren't shown until the very last scene of the movie which works really well since the full CGI ape looks horrible. Speaking of the ending, I loved it, it's not a conventional everyone is happy ending so that's good. All together an unpleasant experience though I've seen much worse. 4/10

[strtfghtr]

Maneater (2007) - The movie series' namesake is about a killer tiger on the loose and terrorizing a small town in the bible belt of America. Different from many of the rest of the series this isn't some genetically mutated beast, or a radioactive alien, or even a mythical monster. No, this is just a plain old escaped everyday run-of-the-mill Bengal Tiger, sounded interesting until it took the step by step predictable moves of your average Jaws clone.

A natural beast invades a small community and starts killing locals, the sheriff investigates but needs the help of an expert in the field to identify the menace and help track it. Groups of hunters are rounded up to catch the creature but to no avail as the body count rises and the tension builds between the mayor trying to bring in tourists for the busiest time of the year and the sheriff wanting to cancel the event. Ultimately, the sheriff teams up with a hunter specializing in the deadly creature who knows the ins and outs of the beast that the rest don't know. After a few more kills it all comes down to the ultimate showdown with the sheriff and the killer beast only to be decided with a last second gun fire that sends the infernal monster back to nature when the explosive tank he shoots goes off.

So did I just describe Jaws or Maneater? Does it really matter? The only reason to watch this garbage is for Gary Busey's big chicklet-like grin.

3/10

[Phaedra]

Is this syfy cheese in general or a slice of exclusive syfy maneater series cheese?

[strtfghtr]

I don't see why it can't be all SyFy, I'll change the title to welcome all the cheese

[Phaedra]

I don't see why it can't be all SyFy, I'll change the title to welcome all the cheese

I had to look up what the maneater series was :blush:

I didn't see the one I was going ta say listed on the Maneater list so didn't want ta put anything down. If you're going with a basic dairy product from syfy, then i'd have to say Piñata: Survival Island. That one would make Ed Wood an academy award shoe in. Horrible horrible movie.

Teens trapped on an island are haunted by a demon hidden inside...a pinata. ... cliff dive that is "Demon Island" (or as some know it as, "Pinata: Survival Island").

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[strtfghtr]

I've heard of it but haven't yet had the displeasure of experiencing it...ha ha it looks atrocious.

[WickedNik]

Sand Sharks
Doesn't look bad, right?
sand-sharks01.jpg

Then it gets worse.
sandsharks1.jpg
SandShark.png

This syfy masterpiece has sharks that some how swim in sand. The graphics are terrible. Brooke Hogan is in it so the acting is terrible. There isn't that much gore. I have no idea why I sat and watched the whole thing, but I couldn't look away.

[Phaedra]

This syfy masterpiece has sharks that some how swim in sand. The graphics are terrible. Brooke Hogan is in it so the acting is terrible. There isn't that much gore. I have no idea why I sat and watched the whole thing, but I couldn't look away.

I was the same way. The best part of the movie was Corin Nemec's antics and wise cracks

[strtfghtr]

I have no idea why I sat and watched the whole thing, but I couldn't look away.

This is how I feel about most SyFy movies

[koolmike]

I loved Sand Sharks

[strtfghtr]

In the Spider’s Web (2007) - Another jungle romp filmed in Thailand, no doubt back to back with Blood Monkey as you can recognize a few of the locations. This time a group of tourists get stranded in a tribe’s jungle village as a girl recovers from a spider bite she received in the jungle. Luckily Dr. Lance Henricksen is on the case with his creepy-ass long nails on one hand. I’m not really sure how they talked him into this but his performance is obviously the stand out of the production. That’s not to say that the cast is entirely terrible. The main girl is decent for the laughable script she has to work with. Probably the toughest thing to swallow in this mess is the actual story. It goes something like this:
Lance Henricksen is a doctor who travels to the jungle to study spiders and look after his deformed psychotic brother. He then takes up the human organ black market and uses spiders to paralyze the victims and preserve their organs. If that sounds stupid, that’s because it IS stupid.

The CGI is the worst in the series yet, and the obviously cotton “spider webs” are distracting to the point of annoyance. Despite its massive flaws, this one has another great ending that you don’t see coming. I wouldn’t say it’s worth the watch but I’ve spent some Saturday afternoons in a worse way.
4/10

[strtfghtr]

Wyvern (2009) - An off the beaten path Alaskan town is terrorized by a big dragon creature. All while trying to confuse the viewer with as many pointless subplots as possible. It seems that everyone in this movie has some sort of useless backstory that for some reason needs to be addressed. Luckily, the sheriff is laid to rest quickly and the local truck driver and waitress can address the situation.

The movie plays out like you would expect with the town doctor playing the part of the former love interest and the truck driver saving the day in an even more idiotic fashion than you would normally expect. Honestly, I’d like to fault this movie for tension but it has plenty of it and keeps you watching. Even my girlfriend had to admit she was kept watching till the very end (which was absolutely terrible BTW) The common town folk like the hunters and the “chefs” of the local BBQ keep themselves as dragon fodder JUST long enough to keep the privileged people of the town still striving.

While the CGI of the movie may be heavy, the situations involved are surprisingly intricate and unique and honestly I cannot fault the SFX dpt of the movie despite the utterly horrible CGI monster that ends up devouring the majority of the cast. The points of entry are unique and the end results are not entirely predictable. A good watch in itself.

6/10

[strtfghtr]

Sand Serpents (2009) - Brown, brown, brown. This movie doesn't have many changes in terms of the whole color scheme. I suppose that’s because the movie is supposed to take place in Afghanistan but I would have like a little color difference somewhere. Anyway, a team of American soldiers are on their last mission and get ambushed by the Taliban, luckily for them there are giant 10 story sand worms underground that eat the taliban and chase the team around for awhile across environments that all look the same. The odd thing about this Taliban is that it seems to be entirely made up of the whitest guys you know.

Eventually the remaining team gets stranded in some underground tunnels and as a plan send a little girl out to help them after her father was blown up on a landmine. If Maneater was a Jaws ripoff, then this movie is a Tremors ripoff, they even use the explosions to trick the worms with sound. The best word to describe this movie is “stale.” If this film were a food it would be week old bread that you put in the toaster oven to try to cover up for its age...it doesn’t work.

[Darkgod]

I go back to these movies like a drug... every once in a while I get a hankerin' and watch a few.... sand sharks, as terrible as it was(the guy from Parker Lewis cant lose is the best actor) is a fun watch... Two Headed Shark Attack is fun as well

[woodenheart]

BattleDogs

[Solo]

I loved Sand Sharks

Sand Sharks