UHM - Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid

I never thought I'd see another cheesy no-brainer flick to go to the theaters. Usually if we want to see that kind of crap we can just visit Blockbuster's New Release section. How this movie got green-lit is beyond me, but it did and here I am writing this review. I have to admit that although this movie wasn't good, it still managed to be better than the boring first movie. When I first heard news of a sequel to Anaconda I thought it was just going to be a low-budget direct-to-video, but then I heard it was getting a 20+ million-dollar budget. You can imagine I was shocked to hear that, especially since the first movie was far from being good. Then again the original did make double its budget in overall box-office sales. I remember originally hearing that a low-budget 1999 direct-to-video flick called "King Cobra" was referred to as an Anacondas 2, but luckily I never bothered to find out myself, because I'm sure it would have been far worse than this.

Here's my interpretation of how a group of brain-dead writers got together to come up with the story:

Head hacnho: Okay guys, we need money, lets make a sequel to something.
Dork at corner: Do you guys remember a movie called Anaconda that came out some years back?
The Group: No.
Dork at corner: The one with J-Lo
The Group: Oh yeah.
Head hancho: You mean to make a sequel to that killer snake flick?
Dork at corner: Uh,yeah, but how about making the group in this movie not-so-dumb, like for instance, hmmm, lets say a group of brainy scientists and money-seeking business-types go in search for a mystical flower called the "Blood Orchid", which can be the key to eternal life.
Head hancho: And we put them in the swampy areas of Borneo and throw in some hungry anacondas! Damn I'm good.
The Group: Brilliant idea sir.
Head Hancho: Oh, and guys, lets put a smart monkey somewhere in the story too. I love monkeys.
The Group: Right away sir!

And that was the story of how Anacondas 2 was born. The End..... Oh yeah, the review. So I'm sure you're asking "if the movie's that bad, why give it a 5-rating?" Well I did find the flick to be somewhat enjoyable since it had a lot of stuff going on-screen and the characters were hell of a lot more interesting than the ones in the first movie. Other than that, the movie wasn't very good. Also, the fact that the Anacondas had teeth and roared like lions when they were going to attack nudged the rating down a few; those pesky Anacondas. I honestly expected better from director Dwight H. Little since he brought us the excellent Halloween 4, but then again, he also brought us Free Willy 2.

OVERALL

A decent movie to watch on TV, where you don't have to pay money to see it; A better flick than the original, but that isn't saying much. Not recommended.

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AlvinA :

Posted 250 days ago

Not enough snake action. Lots of snakes in the pit at the end but it needed lots more snake vs people fights. The beginning had promise with the hero jumping in to fight the croc with a knife in his teeth but fizzled afterwards. The first one had several great action scenes with the aggressive anacondas. Somebody should have dropped a Red Bull in the snake pit (or to the writers.)

triple jjj :

Posted 291 days ago

Hey i didn't really find it that terrible a movie, i actually thought is was pretty kick ass compared to all the other peices of shit that opened that year. Also, its a monster movie man!! all monster movies are supposed to be somewhat cheesy coz if not then it becomes a serious movie and NOBODY LIKES A SERIOUS MONSTER MOVIE. I thought the story was pretty good too, bunch of scientists discover a clue that might tell them how to extend the natural human life expectancy, but the catch is the clue is the living cells within a wild orchid that only exists in a swamp land that is plagued with giant man eating anacondas. And to top it off IT IS FUCKIN MATING SEASON. The characters were pretty interesting and likable (except one really annoying bad guy that has a face you would just love to crush). And the effects were pretty top notch, not for one second did i find myself bored and i was always liking the way they kept the feel of the original with the boat sequences and then decided to switch it up by chucking the boat away (literaly) and leave these people all by them selves on foot. I would give this movie what it deserves 8/10 (in my mind no monster movie should be rated over an 8).

se7en :

Posted 332 days ago

what pile of turd 2/10

Daniel :

Posted 373 days ago

I GIVE THIS MOVIE 4/10

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