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RATING |
| 5 |
| DIRECTOR |
| Jamie Blanks |
CAST |
| Nadia Farès John Brumpton Robert Taylor David Lyons Mathew Wilkinson Jonathan Oldham |
YEAR |
| 2007 |
RUNTIME |
| 82 minutes |
DATE REVIEWED |
| 12 / 24 / 07 |
SHOPPING |
| BUY THIS FILM |
| REVIEWER: FrighT MasteR |
| RATE THIS MOVIE: |
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RATED BY: 32 FAN(S) |
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CURRENT RATING: 7.13 SKULL(S) |
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Storm Warning
Urban Legend and Valentine director Jamie Blanks returns to the genre with a straight-to-DVD Australian survival horror film entitled Storm Warning. I was sold early on, as I've been a fan of films within the survival genre for years, and although the premise wasn't entirely original, I watched the movie with an open mind. Given the fact that it was written by Australian genre vet Everett De Roche (Razorback, Link) only made me more interested. Boy was I in for a disappointment. Roche supposedly wrote the script decades ago, which would explain why so much of it has all been done before; regardless, it's no excuse to still use the script without making modern modifications and offer something new to the sub-genre. Alas, we receive no such luck.
The movie's biggest fault is the entirely been-there-done-that premise -- a couple go on a boat outing and after fishing and relaxing in the sun, notice a storm's brewing from a distance. Instead of simply turning around and heading back to shore, the idiot lawyer boyfriend decides to make a quick trip around a nearby island. Of course the seemingly small island ends up bigger than they expected and as they progress they realize that the water has become more and more shallow. Eventually the storm hits them and they’re forced to seek refuge on the island and come across a busted up old home. With no signs of the owners, they take it upon themselves to enter the house from the backdoor and search for a phone. Obviously there doesn't appear to be a phone, and before they can make themselves comfy, the three drunken redneck owners finally return.
This naturally doesn't bode well with the couple and they're forced to endure the redneck's constant harassment and humiliation before they're thrown into the shed, where the boyfriend receives a busted leg after he attempts to protect his woman from one of the horny redneck's groping hands. Things get worse when the much-feared "Poppa" finally awakens from his drunken slumber and takes over the situation. It doesn't take long before things escalate and the couple (namely the female) has to take matters into their own hands and take care of the pesky hillbillies. Around this time the woman somehow becomes an expert at making traps and sets up a nasty one for one of the men. The movie offers nothing new to the genre, and the only redeeming value is the fairly violent and bloody deaths the men receive towards the end. However, in order to get to that point, we have to sit through the first hour of the film's nonsense and clichéd situations.
OVERALL
The movie offers nothing new to the sub-genre and the only redeeming value it delivers are the violent and bloody deaths towards the end. Sadly, the deaths are entirely too short and aren't even worth sitting through the first hour of the film. Skip this.
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